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June 2nd 2003 is the 50th anniversary of what?

What purpose does the Rideau Canal serve during winter months?

It's the World's Longest Skating Rink! Residents are known to lace on their skates and use it as a mode of transportation to and from work during the winter months.

Political Parodies

Importing to the USA

President George W. Bush called Prime Minister Jean Chretien with a pressing emergency;

"Our largest condom factory has exploded," the American President cried. "My people's favourite form of birth control! This is a disaster!"

"George, da Canajian pipple would be 'appy to do anyt'ing wit'in der power to 'elp you," replied the Prime Minister.

"I do need your help," said Bush. "could you possibly send us 1,000,000 condoms ASAP to tide us over?"

"Certainment! I will get on hit right haway," said Jean.

"Oh, and one small favor, please?" said President George W.

"Oui?"

"Could the condoms be red, white and blue, and at least 10 inches long, with a 4 inch diameter?" asked Bush.

"No prob'lem," replied the Prime Minister, and with that Chretien hung up and called the President of Trojan.

"I need a favour. You got to make 1,000,000 condoms right haway, and sen'dem to Hamerica."

"Consider it done," said the President of Trojan.

"Great! Now listen mon ami. Dey haf to be rouge, blanc et bleu in colour, hat least 10 hinches long, and 4 hinches in dia'meter."

"That's easily done. Anything else?"

"Yes," said the Prime Minister, "an print on dem MADE IN CANADA,
size: MEDIUM."

The above picture reads:

"British Prime Minister John Major (left), Chinese President Jiang Zemen (2nd from left), and U.S. President Bill Clinton (2nd from right), watch a parade of veterans and troops in Moscow's Red Square Tuesday as commemoration to mark the 50th anniversary of the WWII victory continued. Man at right is unidentified."
(man at right? Jean Chrétien)

The last four U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado, and off they spin to OZ. After threatening trials and tribulations, they finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the Great Wizard.

"WHAT BRINGS YOU BEFORE THE GREAT WIZARD OF OZ? WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

Jimmy Carter steps forward timidly: " I've come for some courage."

"NO PROBLEM!" says the Wizard. "WHO IS NEXT?"

Ronald Reagan steps forward, "Well, I think I need a brain."

"DONE," says the Wizard. "WHO COMES NEXT BEFORE THE GREAT AND POWERFUL OZ?"

Up steps George Bush Sr. sadly, "I'm told by the American people that I need a heart."

"I'VE HEARD ITS TRUE," says the Wizard. "CONSIDER IT DONE."

Then there is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around, but doesn't say a word. Irritated, the Wizard finally asks, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

"Is Dorothy here?"

Canuck Quip Archives:

Loonie Toonies

Hockey Humour
I Am Canadian
Regional Ribbing
Political Parodies
Seasonal Jests
Headlines

Political Parodies

Importing to the USA

Canuck Quip Archives:

Loonie Toonies

Trivia EH?

Great White Words

Canuck Quotes