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"Near where I live there's a viaduct |
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A Newfie goes into a coffee shop and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So she peels it off and starts screaming,"I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"
The waitress says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free Lunch."
But the Newfie keeps on screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"
Finally, the manager comes over and says, "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken. You couldn't have possibly won a motor home because we didn't have that as a prize!"
The Newfie says, "No, it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home!"
She hands the ticket to the manager and HE reads... "W I N A B A G E L"
A Newfoundlander working in Toronto decided to visit the zoo one Saturday. While there, he saw a man with an elephant act. The man claimed the elephant could look at a person and tell that person's age. The Newfoundlander was very skeptical and said so, in no uncertain terms.
The man had the elephant look at a small boy and the elephant stamped its foot 9 times. "Is that right?" he asked the boy.
"Oh yes." the boy said.
The Newfoundlander was very loud in his not believing that this was true.
The man asked the elephant to tell the ages of several people, and each time the elephant stamped his foot and the people said he was correct.
The Newfoundlander got even louder and more abusive toward the man. Finally the man could take it no longer and wagered the Newfoundlander that the elephant could look at him and tell him his age. The Newfoundlander took him up on the wager.
The elephant looked real close at the skeptic, turned around, raised his tail and broke wind like you wouldn't believe, Turned back around and stomped his foot twice.
The Newfoundlander stumbled back amazed and with a sound of disbelief in his voice cried, "Gud Lard, me son, he's right...
I'm Farty-two!"
NOTE:The opinions expressed on this page are not necessarily the opinions of the site owner and are meant in the spirit of humour.
If there is any material here that does not give the originator's name, please e-mail us with the details and we will provide the necessary credit.
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